Not the Years but the Mileage
by Random Guise
Summary: Crossover of "The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency" and the idea behind the novel "The Picture of Dorian Gray". Mma Precious Ramotse becomes aware of a mystery brought to her by Mr. JLB Matekoni and decides it bears further investigation. I don't own the show's characters but I've been on the end of a tow truck before.


**A/N: Set early during the TV series "The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency"; I have not read any of the books that were the basis for the series.**

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Not the Years but the Mileage

"Koko!" Mma Precious Ramotse called joyfully, rapping on the front porch column of the headquarters of The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency in the traditional greeting of her country. As the owner and head investigator, she had been out on a social call and was returning to her business to check in with Grace Makutsi, her able secretary with the ninety-seven percent score from the Botswana College of Secretarial and Office Skills. What she had not expected to see was Mr. JLB Matekoni, owner and mechanic of the Tiokweng Road Speedy Motors garage and towing service. The man was a good friend and first person she had ever met when she moved to the Gaborone area.

Gaborone was becoming quite modern and growing quickly; the prospect of moving to the city proper was quite distasteful to Precious, and found the Tiokweng area much more to her liking and similar to her village she had moved from after the death of her father. With her inheritance she had decided to use her skills as a detective to help in a new area she could call home, with a larger group of people that you could get to know. The Kgale Hill community was turning out to be just such a place.

But knowing Mr. JLB Matekoni, as a detective she could see that something wasn't right. The man was usually so friendly, so kind, so _alive; _right now the expression on his face said anything but that even though he wasn't looking at her but lost in thought. "Dumela" she said again, so close now there was no question she addressed him.

"Dumela" he said, as he made a visible change to concentrate on the here and now. He smiled, but it was a bit forced to cover his sour demeanor.

"And what is troubling you this fine day, Rra?" she asked.

"I don't know exactly. It is like I have been given some pieces of a puzzle but I do not know what to do with them."

"Then let us go inside and have a cup of bush tea then" she offered.

"Thank you, but bush tea will not help this problem."

"Will it hurt it?"

"No."

"Then let us have some, and we can talk about your puzzle pieces. If what you have turns out to be a mystery, you have come to the right place" she encouraged, gesturing for him to join her inside. He did half-gratefully, half-reluctantly. They both greeted Grace inside, and in short order Precious had returned with the tea which she sat in front of them on the table. "Now then, tell me of your problem."

"Was Rra Clovis Anderson a mechanic?" he asked, referring to the author of the book Principles of Private Investigation that Precious studied intently to hone her skills.

"He does not say that. But he does not say he is not, either. But being a mechanic is like being a detective I think."

"How is that so?"

"Well, both work with clues to solve a mystery. Rsa Anderson says that being a doctor is like being a detective; you have to investigate a patient to help solve the mystery of why they are sick or what is injured. I would think you do the same for an automobile in your garage."

"I do" JLB agreed. "Sometimes it speaks to me and tells me what is wrong; sometimes it keeps its secret and I must find it myself. But this puzzle I have makes no sense" he said as he took a sip of tea. "It is beyond my experience as a mechanic."

"Tell me" Precious said, grabbing a pen and notebook.

"No, I do not want to take up your time."

"Grace, do I have time to solve another mystery?"

Grace glanced at the big chalkboard that served as a summary of their current work. She pushed up her glasses and announced in a clipped, business-like manner "At the moment, only one case is pending - The Case of the Dusty Bed - and it cannot be continued until next week due to the unavailability of Rra Juhura to be interviewed. As a result, you have exactly zero cases that require your time right now."

"You see - I have time. So tell me" Precious said, prodding the man into talking.

"Very well. At the garage, I know my customers and their vehicles. Many people come to me for service, and I am confident that I can talk to their cars and they will answer. But a very strange thing has been happening lately. I always recommend that my customers change their automobile oil every five thousand kilometers to keep their engines working properly, and many do regularly."

"Yes, I know. I will need to bring in my van soon for servicing depending on if I need to make a trip down south or not."

"Of course. I have a few customers who always drive the same way year after year; I can almost predict when they will call for service. But in the last six months, three of my customers have had to have their automobiles serviced much sooner than normal."

"Perhaps they are driving more, yes?"

"No!" JLB wrung his hands. "I asked, to make polite conversation. They said nothing had changed from their normal habits. I even asked if someone had borrowed their vehicles; all said no."

Precious frowned. "That is odd, but I do not see a problem."

"They thought I might have recorded the mileage wrong or accidentally adjusted their odometers. I would never do such a thing; the Tlokweng Road Speedy Motors has a good, solid reputation that I would never dirty. Something else is causing it."

"Is that all?"

"No, there is more. Two more customers have brought their vehicles to me with problems that should not have been; one was smoking badly and another had a broken speedometer cable. And another had a dented door. And yet another..." JLB threw up his hands. "As I think on it, there have been many odd problems where the customer had no idea how it happened."

"Automobiles break down, or you would not be in business. Certainly someone could have run into the other car and dented the door." JLB stood up and started to pace. "You do not think so" she said.

"I...don't know. But something is happening to my customers and I have a feeling."

"Feelings can be important for a detective; it is your mind telling you where to look when your eyes do not see everything at first. What is the feeling? And please sit down, you are making me tired by your pacing."

The mechanic sat down. "There is one more thing that seems to fit, but it does not. There was a man that came into the garage to have his car fixed. I completely evaluated his car for problems; I inspected it carefully because I had never seen the car before. The man was very rude when he came back into the garage, and when I told him about what I found and how much it would cost to repair it he became angry and said he would fix it himself. He laughed, called me a thief and then he stormed out. That was one year ago."

"What is unusual about that? There are people who have no appreciation for the work of a professional."

"That is true of all professions I think. But this man's automobile..."

"Yes?"

"It had the same problems that the other vehicles had. The same smoking, broken speedometer cable, dented door, flickering taillight...all on the same automobile. The man drove it for many kilometers, often making trips to the Mokolodi Nature Reserve. He said he would never get another automobile."

"That is most peculiar. It is surprising the automobile ran at all with all those problems and yet others seem to have them too."

"Yes, but I saw the man driving two weeks ago; his vehicle looks like it is new, now!" JLB said, his normal restraint slipping. Before Precious could ask he continued "I know what you are going to ask, but it is not a different automobile; it is the same one, because it is the same registration and there are no others like it in the whole of Botswana. It...is...the...same...car."

"The man might have gone to another, less dependable garage to have it repaired but that does not explain the other cars. If his car is the only one of its type, he could not be secretly stealing parts from the other customers."

JLB sat back; he hadn't thought of that possibility, but it was true that the parts would not have been compatible. It was a good deduction from Mma Ramotse.

"Do you know where this man lives?"

"Yes. You are not going to confront him, are you?"

"A detective does not confront until they have all the facts they can gather. I wish to observe the man and investigate. Can you take me to his house?"

"I could, but the man knows what I look like. Since he paid his bill I have no reason to visit him."

Precious thought for some time. She stood and walked slowly out of the room, and strolled to the front doorway where she stood and gazed at her surroundings. She thought she might ask her good friend BK at the Last Chance Salon to help her, but he was busy with several customers. He caught her looking and waved between snips; she returned the gesture, then walked back inside and entered the office again. "Could you come up with a way to fix his vehicle more cheaply?" she asked.

"More cheaply? Well..." he thought "...I could charge less for my labor I suppose, and maybe find used or compatible parts. But why would I for this man?"

"Sometimes a detective needs an excuse to visit a location. The excuse must be plausible and truthful, in the event that your motives are questioned. I am looking for an excuse to observe while you talk to the man; it would be even better if we could go inside his house for the conversation."

Now it was JLB's turn to think. "I can come up with a new cost estimate; I could ask to spread it out to show him the paperwork with the new, lower amount. Yes, I can do that. How will I explain you, Mma?"

"I can be _your_ new assistant. Let me provide the paperwork to you when we are there and then while you are showing him the numbers I will look around and observe."

"Let me go to my garage and I will make the necessary paperwork" he said as he stood again. He thanked Precious and departed.

...

A middle-aged man answered the door after hearing a knock. "Dumela, Rra Minghella. I am Mr. JLB Matekoni from the Tlokweng Road Speedy Motors garage. Do you remember me?" the mechanic asked.

Rra Minghella smiled slyly. "Of course I do. Why are you bothering me? I have no need of your services."

Precious elbowed JLB where it couldn't be seen, prodding him to press the point. "I know that you found the cost of my services too high to repair your vehicle. I have done some research and after great effort have produced a lower estimate. May I show it to you?"

"My automobile is, heh heh, still running."

"Ah, yes, but I feel as though the reputation of my garage is at stake. May I please at least present the estimates to you?" the mechanic implored.

"Oh, if you insist. But I assure you that I don't need your services."

"Thank you, Rra. My assistant has brought the estimates with us. If I could have a table to show you the papers, please?" Reluctantly, Minghella lead the two into his main room where a cleared table was available. Painstakingly, JLB laid out the original estimate and then with additional paperwork how he was able to reduce the cost by different means. "So you see Rra, I will accept less money for my wages in addition to the alternative sourcing for parts. You can save over 2300 Pula on the work with this estimate."

"The numbers say the same thing" Minghella said dryly. "But let me show YOU something now." With a bit of glee, he led the mechanic out the back door to a garage. He opened up the door and went inside; a few seconds later the engine of the automobile started and he backed it out of the garage. He exited the vehicle and gleefully showed off what obviously was his pride. "Hop inside; rev the engine, walk around it - open the bonnet if you wish. You will find that I have found a much better mechanic."

JLB did just that, remarking what a fine piece of work the repairs had been. "Who is the genius who fixed your vehicle? This man is far better than I am with automobiles."

"Oh, that bit of information is a secret" Minghella said coyly. "This...ah...genius draws his talents from many sources. But as you can see, it is as I said: I have no need for your services."

"That you do not, Rra."

"Where is your assistant?" Minghella asked, looking around.

"She is probably gathering up the estimate papers, or she might have returned to my truck."

"I don't like strangers in my house" the owner said as he hurried inside. He looked around the rooms quickly and then glanced out the front door. Precious was indeed waiting in the truck parked outside.

"See, she is simply waiting for me to finish. Thank you for listening to my proposal anyway, Rra" JLB said with an affected note of disappointment.

"Not at all; it just goes to show that there are always alternatives" Minghella said, smirking at the pun.

"Yes, indeed. Good day, and thank you again."

Inside the truck, the mechanic started to ask Precious what she had observed. She shushed him and waved her hand to indicate they should drive away; she said nothing until they were back in the confines of the detective agency office.

JLB sat and waited the best he could while Precious wrote a few things in her notepad. Finally, she set down her pen and looked at the man across from her. "I think I may know what has happened, but I do not like it."

"Tell me, please. I already do not like it. Rra Minhella does not feel right to me; I cannot explain it. I also cannot explain his automobile - it is in almost new condition just as it looks, and it has less than four thousand kilometers on the odometer! But it _feels_ like the very same car. It even has a missed welding spot from the factory in the same place his other car had. Has. I can't explain it."

"There is a way to explain it; please hear me out. While you so excellently kept Rra busy, I looked around the room we were in. Did you notice the writing desk with the car models on it?"

"No. I was too busy keeping _him_ busy."

"That is good. I noticed it, and you gave me time to take a few photos. Do these look familiar?" She adjusted the setting on her camera, and showed the close-up photos she took of the model cars.

Slowly, the mechanic's expression changed to astonishment as he viewed the photos. "This is a model of Rra's automobile. Many of these are the same type of automobiles my customers own. Look, this one has the dent in the door. And this one has the faded paint on the trunk. See the black on the rear of this one? Vehicles look like that when they smoke. What does it mean?"

"Let me show you" she said as she advanced a few pictures to the last one, showing a ceramic figure of a stylized cat. "Do you know what this is?"

"A cat."

"Yes. But a special cat. This is in the design of the ancient Egyptians, and it is said that it can be used to summon magic. Black magic."

"Magic? In this age?" he asked.

Precious shrugged. "I have no other explanation. This is what I see: Rra Minghella is using dark magic to cast his automobile's problems onto others. That is why you recognize some of the models - they get the problem, and his vehicle is fixed. The model of his automobile probably started out like his with all the problems. One by one he has traded them to another to repair his. He has transferred most of the mileage too, so that his is eternally young while others will pay the price of his evil."

JLB sat and took some time to absorb the information. At last he asked "What can we do? If nothing happens, he will continue to use other people's automobiles to rejuvenate his own."

"Well, the mystery is solved. But you must not fight evil with evil, although it may be tempting at times. Since we have brought the evil to light, tonight in our evening prayers we will ask God to provide justice for the people and their vehicles and see what happens."

"Agreed."

Perhaps it was coincidence, but two days later Rra Minghella's lamp fell from his ceiling, smashing a certain cat figurine. Shortly after, an electrical short in his garage caused a fire that burned it and the car located inside to the ground.

His house was listed for sale shortly after that.

The End

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**A/N: As mentioned at the start, I have not read any of the series of books that were the basis for the TV series. It was an enjoyable series that was not renewed for a second season, and the emphasis was as much on character and culture as it was mystery.**

**I thought of this idea for the story while driving my two hours of commuting each day to work and back. I drive a lot of miles, and as my tired engine roared down the highway before needing another oil change I thought how it would be so much better if I could just skim a few miles off the car by "vampiring" them from other, newer vehicles. Then I started thinking about other wear and tear, and the book The Picture of Dorian Gray came to mind. At that point all I needed was to fit it to a show with a mechanic, and Mr. JLB Matekoni fit the bill nicely.**

**The title, of course, was taken from a line spoken by Indiana Jones to Marion Ravenwood in "Raiders of the Lost Ark".**


End file.
